We went to the sweat lodge ceremony last night, out at the tribe's ceremonial grounds on the prairie. The sun had begun to go down, but the sky was grey with thick, swirling clouds spanning the entire horizon. As we cut the wood and built the fire, lightning began to flash across the edges of the sky in bold, bright bolts. The rain began to pelt us with fat, cold drops--not a downpour, just a refreshment. So there we were, on the prairie surrounded by lightning, cooled by raindrops, and smelling the aroma of burning cedar wood. There were only five of us total for the ceremony last night, so we just sat in the soft grasses and talked and talked.
As it got darker, the lighting became more intense and vivid. It began to shoot horizontally, igniting the thick black clouds. This wasn't a dangerous kind of storm; the lightning was in the far horizon and nothing became severe. Just amazing. Rain continued to drizzle. It wasn't that kind of miserable, muddy, gloomy rain; it was that refreshing, sweet-smelling, cool rain that only spatters you but doesn't soak you.
We went all four rounds, and the leader made it hot, as usual. There was a lot of stuff we needed to "work on" in the ceremony, and I talked to the leader about it as we rested in the grass.
The anger is easier to manage for me. As hard as it was, I knew I needed to pray for someone who has been very hurt, and hurtful, in our lives recently. I came to understand that hurt people hurt people.
It was a difficult sweat, not just because of the stinging heat but because of these personal difficulties. All I can do is pray about it and be the man I know I can be, and hope that's enough. No, it IS enough. I'm a good man--that IS enough.
I watched the amazing lightning all the way home, 30 miles through the Oklahoma country.
As it got darker, the lighting became more intense and vivid. It began to shoot horizontally, igniting the thick black clouds. This wasn't a dangerous kind of storm; the lightning was in the far horizon and nothing became severe. Just amazing. Rain continued to drizzle. It wasn't that kind of miserable, muddy, gloomy rain; it was that refreshing, sweet-smelling, cool rain that only spatters you but doesn't soak you.
We went all four rounds, and the leader made it hot, as usual. There was a lot of stuff we needed to "work on" in the ceremony, and I talked to the leader about it as we rested in the grass.
The anger is easier to manage for me. As hard as it was, I knew I needed to pray for someone who has been very hurt, and hurtful, in our lives recently. I came to understand that hurt people hurt people.
It was a difficult sweat, not just because of the stinging heat but because of these personal difficulties. All I can do is pray about it and be the man I know I can be, and hope that's enough. No, it IS enough. I'm a good man--that IS enough.
I watched the amazing lightning all the way home, 30 miles through the Oklahoma country.
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